People with their Emotions.
Okay, so I’ve been thinking. Everyone has gone through this stereotype kind of situations,right?
You know. — you get ignored, left out, unwanted or stuffs like that and you feel so lonely like you’re not worth it.
Do you now get it? Those kinds of emotions!
Can we just stop for a sec and look at how things work? Okay, so maybe, just maybe,you’re not that all important in their life but it’s the opposite with you. I’m talking about that friend, this guy, that girl, those people who you chose to put your heart with and let them get away with it, possibly though, you let them have all the advantage because you think they’re worth it. I get it.
How do you deal with these kinds of shits? Well, most probably I would fuck off. Normally, that’s how people deal with it. But what if you like them too much? That they’re special and you won’t ever meet anyone that special again? Then stick to it. Endure the pain, ignore their carelessness over your feelings, don’t stop tolerating yourself until you come to your senses and realize how much you’ve wasted so much time. Go ahead, suffer. It’s what you wanted right? To feel the pain of constant rejection. Go ahead! Bleed yourself to death. You must’ve thought that it’ll feel numb sooner or later, but it didn’t! It hurt like hell. Come on, take it. You wanted this.
You think you’re better off?
Then stop it.
Stop looking at their account, their facebook, their twitter, their blogs, all of them. Stop looking until you don’t stop feeling that way. It’s much better to suffer secretly alone than tell everybody how lonely you are and bother them constantly. You’ll get over this. Of course you can!
Start off by making yourself happy. Do what you want, have what you want, read anything you want, and not for long, while you weren’t looking, you’ll forget about this person. You’ll move on.
The moment you set your eyes on them again, you’ll feel nothing. Everything’s fine again. But always be cautious at your heart, because while you were laughing with them, while you guys were having fun and constantly repeating to your head that things has never been this great, one moment later on, you’ll be back where you started. It’s funny how hard you tried moving on and with just a flick of a finger you can’t remember how deep the cliff you just fell on. So be ready. Be cautious. Don’t ever let your guard down. Especially when you’re beside them, not even talking, just knowing their presence is there, the silence your sharing. Your talking to each other without opening your mouths. it’s really different ‘cause it’s so sincere. Don’t ever even think about it. Maybe that’s just your imagination. Think of other things, be strong. Be cautious. Don’t ever let your guard down.
It’s for your own good.
Maybe you thought it’s worth the risk, and maybe you were right.
Sometimes the people you’d take a bullet for, are the ones with the gun.
But then again, these are just emotions.
My friend wanted to borrow my camera a while for a morning shoot, when he gave it back to me, the lens was different. I never checked the item when I left their house and when I was half way from their home, I got a text message that the lens got switched. Considering his lens were more expensive than mine, I told him jokingly ‘thanks! hahahaha’.
But seriously though, I’ll borrow the lens for a day and return it tomorrow the way I promised him. He got pretty concern by the way. haha. It’s a AF-S nikkor 35mm 1:1 8G nikkon DX lens. And since I don’t have plans going out, I just took some shots around the house. PLAYTIME.
The first up to greet me ‘good morning’ is chichay! With her satisfying look of surprise, I caught her glimpse just in time.
Took a picture after breakfast, am I a little too blur?
We haven’t celebrated Christmas sincerely since Papa and Kuya died. I miss having a warm Christmas celebration around the house. It’s good mommy came to her senses and finally chose to celebrate Christmas this year. I would prefer to be Jolly, any time of the day.
It’s going to be Christmas soon! And mommy had all the decorations done and of course, a day of Christmas cannot be complete without a Christmas tree! YEY! I pushed her to buy more decorations just so the Christmas tree would look rounded and plump. Some of the decorations were two to three years old and some of them were recently bought. HOHO!
I remember the day when mommy bought this figurine from Clark, Pampanga. We go there almost every month just to look for bargained items, I don’t remember the exact price, but I heard it’s quite cheap.
It’s hard to achieve a negative space if your subject is a little too big.
Anyway, I guess that’s about it with my recent adventures around the house. There’s nothing much going on since I’m just bored and have been feeling this strong desire over a photo shoot. Hmm, maybe I will. The sooner I get a job and try to get some fun around the world, or maybe, just for starters, around manila. HAHA. And apply for ‘Enjoy Philippines’ (It’s a discount card I found at the net, with lots of freebies!). I don’t know, I think I’m just over-blogging.
— Jacob; Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children
— Leper; A Seperate Peace
Today I had the privilege to bond the whole afternoon with my longtime friend, Janelle. Nothing can be more comfortable than talking with a friend whom you haven’t seen for quite some ages. Well, not that long. But for some several months I should say.
Job hunts, People, Books and Blogs were mostly what we’ve been talking about. It’s really good how you haven’t talked for so long that all the stories and experiences (especially the weird ones) have built up and you guys feel like the whole day isn’t enough to catch on from your daily lives that you feel you could just explode from all the blabbering ‘cause it will be midnight soon and you guys just have to get home early and live your daily routine again tomorrow. I don’t know, I guess I kind of miss talking to her alone. There’s no really more securer feeling than talking to your old childhood bestfriend. And it’s pretty surprising that no matter how long we never had this kind of bonding, we still get along pretty well. At least in my case, though.
We kind of just roamed around the mall at SM North EDSA all day, looking for a place to sit and chat all the way. Getting all excited with what we’ve been missing up to. And everything’s seems to remain the same with both of our lives, except for the fact that she already got 3 different jobs and well, here I am, a graduate, but, a really useless bum in the house, a total incompetent, insignificant, obnoxious person. Oh what the hell. I’ll get through this soon, I hope!
I also bought some books while I was waiting for her at fullybooked. yey! At last I got the chance to let my fingers sink in with the feel of this rubbery-leather-like cover! If you’re thinking I bought this book because of the cover, well… I guess you are half right. HAHA.
I have been lusting with this book for weeks now, since the day I saw it with a friend, I’ve been coming back and forth at that same branch over and over again hoping I can sneak it out without the guard noticing it, but of course that joke was — half-meant. HAHA. And it feels so good to have it in your hands. I already read 2 of the stories, out of 101. On top of my leathery book is Miss Peregrine’s Peculiar Children. Most of you of course must have heard of this book already, for I know it had received an award from Printz for teen literature. Anyway, this book is pretty creepy, and I think I rather read it tomorrow when the sun’s up.
I know I should be up tomorrow by 8, but for some reason, I can’t sleep. Urgh. My body clock is so messed up. D:
A couple of weeks ago, my cat died. His name was Jarvis, the bravest cat I’d known to let me pet him. It was really devastating to see him die like that. That morning I remember petting him before eating breakfast and petting him again after I ate and went to bed to read. When I got tired of reading I went out and saw him breathing heavily. I thought he must’ve been playing too much and when I poked him, (I always poke him when I want to start a play-fight) he leaned down motionless but still breathed heavily. And his eyes were half open. I started to panic and called ate berta for help. Our labandera, Manang Annie came for help too. But it was no use, he was starting to lose consciousness. Mommy was there too, and she was observing me. Until he stop breathing. I confronted ate berta that maybe she put something unusual in Jarvis’ food, but it was the same brand of sardines that we kept feeding him. I even checked just to be sure. After Jarvis died, I couldn’t help my eyes as it started to burn and I could feel tears would escape from it. By that time, I slowly crept inside my bedroom and locked the door. Mommy was overly concerned about my situation, and I awkwardly ran to my friend’s house for comfort.
I didn’t return home that day and the next morning, I got a text from mommy telling me she got me three cats: two mixed breed and one that’s most spoiled of all, the persian. The other night, one of the mixed breed died because of his heavy flu. And one of my friend bought home another cat, I named her claudette. More like CLAW-dette. She’s really cute! It’s the orange one with gray eyes on the right. And beside her is Tisoy.
Why Tisoy? Well, ‘cause he’s white. So all in all, they’re still three.
The persian cat is very spoiled so it’s hard to get her a nice picture, but! I still managed to get a picture of her!
Her name is Chichay by the way, mommy named her from a character in g2b. Anyway, I took a video of her a couple of weeks ago and uploaded it on instagram. Yup, she’s the cat who’s been bugging me while I’m on the net. She’s always curious how the cursor moves on the screen and sometimes she tries to catch it. It’s really funny when you see it live. Even if she’s spoiled, she’s very spontaneous like me. HAHA.
But Jarvis, you will always be missed. No funny or spontaneous cat could ever replace you even if they give me a dozen of different cat breeds, you’re still the first ever stress reliever and the nicest cat of all. Even if you like to bite me a lot. haha. I miss you, Jarvis!
— Anne Frank